What If Your Greatest Adventure Hasn't Happened Yet?

In Palm Desert, California 2013

There's a quote attributed to the novelist George Eliot that you may have heard of: "It's never too late to be what you might have been." I first discovered it in my twenties, when I was trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing with my life and feverishly reading and saving any little bit of inspiration I could find. Now, with a lot of life experiences (including some traumatic) behind me, I think of it as a roaring, unequivocal call to arms. It's a reminder that life isn't a linear race to a finish line, but a series of detours, each one an opportunity to reinvent, pivot, and start over.

I have started over more times than I can count. I've been an office worker in a business suit, a bartender, a beeper salesperson, a travel agent, worked in radio promotions, a voiceover artist fueled by coffee and deadlines, a fledgling entrepreneur with a business plan sketched on sticky notes, a notebook, and my MacBook, and a student again, taking classes with people young enough to be my kids. Each pivot was exciting but a little daunting. But here's the secret I've learned: it's in starting over and trying new things, especially if they're a little scary-or even very scary-and outside our comfort zone, that we truly find ourselves, grow, and gain insights, sometimes in amazing and eye-opening ways. The world also has a funny way of telling us that by a certain age, our stories should be written, our paths set in stone. We're expected to have it all figured out, to be settled and secure. But what if the greatest adventure lies not in sticking to the script, but in ripping it up and writing a new one?

The Myth of the Midlife Crisis

We've all heard the term "midlife crisis," often painted as a desperate attempt to recapture youth or experience things we may have missed out on. To me, this period is an opportunity for realignment. The psychologist Carl Jung believed that the first half of life is merely a period of preparation, a time of gathering experiences and building a foundation. It's in the second half that we truly begin to live on our terms, to integrate all the parts of ourselves and pursue what brings us genuine meaning and purpose.

For many of us, our 20s and 30s are spent building a life based on external expectations: the career we thought we should have, the relationships others told us were right. We climb the ladder, we tick the boxes, and then one day, we wake up and realize we're living someone else's dream. That's not a crisis; it's an awakening. It's the moment you finally permit yourself to ask, "What do I want?"

The Superpower of Life Experience

We live in a culture that often glorifies youth, but it's in our later years that we gain our greatest superpower: life experience. The decades we've spent navigating relationships, managing finances, and weathering life's storms have given us a depth of wisdom and resilience that can't be taught in a classroom.

I think of someone like Julia Child, who didn't even learn to cook until her late 30s and launched her legendary television show, "The French Chef," at the age of 51. Or Vera Wang, who was a figure skater and a journalist before she revolutionized the bridal industry at 40. They didn't succeed despite their age; they succeeded because of it. Their rich and varied life experiences are what set them apart.

My journey has taught me the incredible value of my past selves. Every seemingly random twist and turn in my career or life path had been preparing me for the next chapter. The truth is, your life experience is a treasure trove of transferable skills. Problem-solving, communication, emotional intelligence, leadership – these are the qualities that are truly valuable in any profession, and they are the very skills that are sharpened and refined over a lifetime.

Embracing the Pivot

The idea of starting over can be intimidating, especially when you have financial obligations and a lifetime of habits to overcome. But with a bit of planning and self-compassion, it's totally possible. Here are a few things I've learned along the way:

• Rediscover Your Passions: Take some time for introspection. What truly lights you up? What did you love to do before life got in the way? What gave you joy as a little kid? (I write that last question knowing that not everyone had a supportive, safe, nurturing, and loving childhood, and I see you and feel you and hear you.) Make a list of your interests, no matter how frivolous they may seem. This is the fertile ground from which your next chapter will grow. 

• Do Your Research: Once you have an idea of what you might want to do, dive deep. Talk to people who are already in that field. Google is your friend. What does a typical day look like? What are the challenges? What are the rewards? This will help you make an informed decision and avoid romanticizing a new career.

• Upskill and Reskill: Don't be afraid to go back to school, take a course, sign up for a class, or even a meetup group. Continuous learning is essential for everyone, regardless of age. Brushing up on specific skills or acquiring new qualifications is not only invaluable but will also boost your confidence. You'll also meet some cool and interesting people, make new friends, and establish valuable connections.

• Leverage Your Network: The connections you've made over the years are a valuable asset. Let people know what you're doing in places like LinkedIn or Facebook. You never know who can offer support and advice.

• Embrace the Beginner's Mindset: Be prepared to be a beginner again. It can be humbling, especially if you're used to being an expert in your field. But there's also an incredible freedom in not having all the answers. Allow yourself to be curious and to make mistakes. It's all part of the learning process.

The Unseen Benefits of a Later-in-Life Bloom

The rewards of a midlife pivot extend far beyond a new career or a new season in life. Starting over can have a profound impact on your overall well-being. It can lead to a renewed sense of purpose and increased life satisfaction. When you're engaged in work that you find meaningful and fulfilling, it energizes every aspect of your life. When you put yourself and your needs first, you're able to show up for others as your best self.

Your Story is Still Being Written

I no longer see my life as a series of unrelated, disconnected chapters. I see it as a rich and intricate tapestry, with each thread representing a different experience and a different lesson learned. The corporate world taught me about professionalism and strategy. Freelancing taught me the importance of self-discipline and resilience. Relationships taught me about patience, love, setting boundaries, and what I will or won't tolerate. And now I'm weaving all those things together to create something new, something that is uniquely and authentically me.

So, to anyone out there who feels like it's too late, who feels like their time has passed: Your story is far from over. The most exciting chapters may be yet to come. Embrace the detours. Welcome the pivots. And never be afraid to start over. It is in the messy and often terrifying process of reinvention that we discover our true selves, who we are meant to be, and what we are meant to do.

#careerchange #midlife #careerpivot #lifeexperience #startingover #reinvention